Linda May Barnes is a minor character from the Dukes of Hazzard.
History[]
Linda May is the girlfriend of Rafe Logan. After he is arrested, her and Denny work together to break him out of prison.
Appereances[]
New Deputy in Town[]
When entering Hazzard, she sees Bo and Luke Duke escape from Cletus Hogg. She overtakes them in her car before cutting them off and holding them at gunpoint. The boys get on the window’s and she tells them to get out of their car, which they do. Luke asks what seems to be the problem and she snaps that she saw them escaping from the deputy. Bo says that was only Cletus and Cletus arrives. Luke tells her she can relax and turn the gun away. As Cletus gets out she tells him ‘it’s okay deputy, I caught them for you’ which Cletus thanks her before trailing off, remarking that she is pretty. Cletus introduces the boys and she puts away the gun. Luke asks that she is out of her jurisdiction and she says she was assigned to a temporary duty in Hazzard. She says she has to go report in and says the boys are ‘deputy Hogg’s before leaving as the three say goodbye.
After arriving in Town she goes into the Police Department. She approaches Boss Hogg and Rosco, who are arguing and tries to get his attention three times before they turn to her and she explains that she is Officer Barnes. When Rosco asks ‘you mean L.M. Barnes’ she salutes saying ‘Officer Linda May Barnes reporting for temporary duty’. Boss introduces himself as the commissioner and invites her to have a piece of his chitin pizza. She declines saying she has to watch her figure. She tells Rosco that the US Marshal has sent him signed secret orders before handing over an envelope. Rosco thanks her before taking it. Boss leaves to answer the phone and Rosco tells her it’s his fat sister before reading the paper. He asks isn’t Rafe Logan Public Enemy Number two and she nods. She is surprised when Boss tells her that those orders just made his day. Boss thanks her saying he was having a cash flow problem and as a thank you he wants to offer her a piece of his pizza that is handmade with his own recipe. She looks at it in disgust but takes one, even more disgusted when Boss says it has chitlins and hog fat. Boss encourages her to take a big bite and when he isn’t looking she puts it in the trash. Boss mentions he will sell the pizza to all the people coming to look at the jail cell. She becomes alarmed as Boss talks about selling tickets to see the jail sell, t-shirts, figurines. She protests that this is top secret and Boss tells her he was talking about afterwards.
Cletus comes in and tells them about her catching Bo and Luke, to which Boss says she is the only one in Hazzard who has nailed Dukes. When Boss says to hand over the citation, she says the boys also damaged his patrol car, making the Duke boys liable for that as well. She is amused by Boss’ distress learning Bo and Luke didn’t pay the ticket. Cletus tells them that the boys are outside and Rosco and Cletus prepare to go after them. She asks if they want some help, which Rosco snaps they don’t need help.
She goes out to the phone booth in town and makes a call. Denny answers and she tells him that their scam is working perfectly and they bought his phone call. Denny tells her that Rafe should be in Hazzard by 5 to which she says perfect and by 5:05 they will have his brother sprung. He tells her he’ll be there around 4. She gives him directions of a place they can meet.
After learning Bo and Luke escaped, Boss swears her in as acting sheriff in front of Cletus and Rosco. She smirks as Boss expresses that he can’t take any chances with Rafe Logan. She tells Boss that she doesn’t want to go causing trouble and Boss asks her to call him Jefferson saying it’s not a problem before taking her toward his office. Lulu calls again and after Boss hangs up they go into his office saying there is a lot of particular points he has to tell her about.
Boss tells her it’s time to make a pizza and she can wait around and watch him do it, to which she gives a forced smile. Boss starts rolling out some dough and asks if she would like to try to which she says ‘oh I’d love to Jefferson’. He hands her the rolling pin and helps her roll it out, putting his arms around her. Boss asks if he’s too close to which she says ‘oh no Jefferson’. A woman suddenly barges in and she freezes in shock. The woman starts yelling as Boss, who hides behind her. Realizing she is Lulu, Linda May moves back and out of the way. She nods to back up Boss when he says he was only showing her how to roll a pizza dough. She tries not to laugh as they fight.
While in the Police Station, Boss calls for her over the CB. When she answers he tells her he’s having a domestic issue and needs her to run things for a while. Linda May tries not to laugh in amusement.
At the police station she watches Boss talk on the phone to his wife. When the call ends she tells Boss that she is really sorry she caused him so much trouble with his wife. Boss tells her it isn’t her fault and Lulu is like that but will get over it. Boss shows her a sign to get peoples pictures taken with Rafe Logan, infuriating her. She tells him that he promised that there would be no talk about Rafe Logan until after he left. She insists it is top secret and Boss says it just a small town and there’s no harm in selling a few tickets, upsetting her even more.
As Boss starts writing down ticket numbers, she tells him that this is an undercover operation. She insists it has got to remain a secret. They hear Ken Collins’ call on the CB and she picks up the mike to answer it. The Marshal introduces himself before asking if they can use the jail facilities for the night. She tells him it will be their pleasure and they will have everything waiting. She tells Boss it’s almost four and she has to go out for a while. She tells Boss that he has to promise her something, to give her his word that it’s going to be a secret. He does and she heads out.
Outside she is approached by Jesse and Daisy. Jesse says they have lost six good hens and Daisy asks for her to come out to the farm but she tells them that she has an emergency call an to come back tomorrow. She ignores their protests and leaves.
She arrives at the meeting place where Denny is already parked. She gets out and she hugs him, telling him they got lucky and asking if he can believe that they made her the acting sheriff and it could be a whole new career. When he asks if they are all set she says that the Marshal will arrive with Rafe at 5. When he says that’s good she becomes annoyed saying there is only one problem. She says there is a fat butter ball named Boss Hogg trying to turn it all in a circus. She tells him that Boss wants to charge admission to the jail and sell t-shirts that say ‘Rafe Logan slept here’. He assures her they’ll take care of it. They hear a stick snap and she turns around, finding Bo and Luke. She pulls out her gun, asking what are they doing there. Denny decides to kill them and she says she has an idea as they only need the boys out of the way until they are long gone. She pulls out a handcuff saying to use the tools of her trade and he agrees, saying to cuff them one hand a piece. She goes to Bo, putting one on him first, then Luke. She then pulls Luke to the passenger side of Denny’s car, cuffing him to the mirror. Denny then sends the car downhill. They get in Linda’s car and leave.
They arrive at the Police Department and Denny remarks it’s not much of a town to which she says what he sees is what he gets. They go inside to see Boss, Rosco, Cletus, Daisy, Jesse, and Cooter fighting and the entire place decorated. Horrified she asks what is going on there. When Denny draws his gun she follows suit. Denny says they need to get them all out of there and she tells him there is a jail cell downstairs except Flash who's hiding from them. He says for them to get the group down there and clean up. They force the six down. After they re all locked up and Denny has Cletus strip, she goes upstairs and cleans up.
She greets the Marshal when he comes in with Rafe. When Ken asks if she can watch his prisoner so he can wash up, she agrees pointing where the bathroom is. As he moves toward it, she hits him from behind knocking him out. Rafe praises her and they kiss before he tells her to get him out of the cuffs and pointing to where the keys are on the Marshal’s belt. She gets them and sets Rafe free. As they go outside she notices Lulu, telling Rafe it’s Boss’ wife. Rafe says they’ll take her with them. As Rafe grabs Lulu, she gets in the car behind the drivers seat before taking off.
As they drive Rafe says they are in the clear and to dump Lulu. She stops to allow Lulu out then keeps driving.
They celebrate their success at dumping Lulu, Rafe commenting ‘nice work honey’. However, they are all surprised when the General Lee jumps over them and forces them off the road, hitting a tree. After Rafe and Denny are knocked out, Bo pulls her from the car and puts her hands on the roof.
She is taken to Atlanta by the marshal.